Exchange Theory The exchange theory reminds me about what is happening in our natural environment on a daily basis. Some individuals enter into relationships for rewards excluding love. For example I have had friends who have entered into relationships with married men and when you asked them why they are doing it, They will clearly state that the married man will give them money, gifts, love, take them out to many places and the list goes on. They will tell you they don’t have to wash, cook and clean for this man because that’s the duty of his wife. Looking at the situation one may asked why this young lady is wasting her time on this man when there is no future in the relationship. This means most times the man will not divorce his wife for this mistress. Knowing this, the young lady will out rightly tell you that she does not want him to leave his wife because he is satisfying all her needs in the present situation. So right there she sees her rewards exceeding the cost of the relationship. As the theory speaks to reciprocity, I have had experience of this with my immediate family member. I was always buying gifts for my cousin’s birthday because I think birthdays are important and persons should be treated special on such days. Over several years, I have noticed that not even a phone call I would get when it’s my birthday so I decided to stop what I was doing, because I was not motivated to continue. I would do other little kind things to her like putting credit on her phone and I have noticed that I was the one making all the calls. Whenever she calls she is asking me to grant her favours. Having experienced this, the theory has re-enforced the concept I have about some individuals that they are opportunist. They are friends with you because of what you have to give them.
I do agree with you Suzette that some persons are opportunists. As it relates to the young lady being involved with married men, it is only the tangible rewards example money and going to fancy places, that forms the basis of her relationship and nothing else. If a particular married man is unable to offer her those rewards she is not going to stick around. Sometimes even us are opportunists, we maintain a level of friendship with persons based on the links or access they have to important persoons or things we need to achieve our goals.
The exchange theory forms the basis of relationships that exist in the environment. It views humans as rational beings who are motivated by self- interest. Some persons engage in relationships only because of the benefits they can get. An example of one such person is my friend. She is controlling and demands maximum attention at all times. She is interested in men who own fancy rides, give her money, and pay her bills and men who are associated with the upper echelons of society. If she dates someone who falls short of any of these expectations she discontinues all forms of communication with the person. She has never yet mentioned anything about love and affection; it’s all about the tangible benefits. As people calculate their benefits versus the cost of their relationships they also make comparisons. We often compare ourselves with other persons which lead us into making decisions. An example of this is my sister’s previous relationship. She ended the relationship with her boyfriend because her benefits were less than what her best friend was getting. She wanted to be on the same level with her best friend. She too wanted money, house, a car and opportunities to travel to different countries among other things. One may say it is not all that you should want from a relationship, but that was all she wanted the other rewards did not matter much to her. The theory also looks at reciprocity, where we meet each other’s need I can relate to that in my previous relationship. My children’s father only spoke about what I will have to do for him, when we are living together and not what he was going to do for me. This contributed to me ending our relationship, as he was very selfish and inconsiderate. In concluding the theory emphasizes that relationships are determined by the rewards or benefits a person can get.
Many may have stared at an older man with a younger woman. For those who have stared, since you are curious, the Exchange Theory is the answer to your provoked thought which is, his or her reward is greater than the cost. The Exchange theory examines people as being self motivated by reward versus cost. The focused of this theory is that people maximizes their rewards and minimizes their cost. Consequently, people remain in their situations because their reward is greater than the cost. This theory speaks of rewards and cost as resources ( tangible and intangible) such as money, control good looks, youth , power, fame or attraction to name a few. A relationship will therefore be established if the rewards are greater or equal to the cost. In Social Exchange Theorist, it is assumed that it is the balance and imbalance of cost and rewards that leads to marriage or divorce. Though this assumption may be the case for some many does not spend the time to weight their rewards against their cost. Many are forced into marriages because of traditional rites while some in marriages because of affected self-esteem, self-concept and self worth. For example my neighbour continues to live with her husband with years of abuse. When she is questioned about the continuation of the marriage, she will ask, 'who will love and cherish a woman who is not beautiful with ten (10) children. Clearly my neighbour has a self-esteem problem because she does not think she can get love and affection from a decent man.
The Exchange Theory is one of the most realistic theories about the family. Everyone is motivated by the answer to the question, “what is in it for me?” A smart individual seeks a relationship that benefits or reward them rather than a relationship that punish or cost them. However, rewards or costs are selective to each individual and their situation. What one person would consider a reward another may consider it a cost depending on what they believe is fair to them.
Before knowing about the exchange theory there was a point in my life where I had to measure the cost and rewards in my family. I had the decision of moving to live with my baby’s father or staying in my permanent job. This decision would cost me my job, independence and my freedom (not having to wash, cook and clean for one extra person). The benefit of this would include having the love of my life with me every minute of the day. In my opinion the cost over weighs the benefit. Even though we stayed in the relationship we had to adjust and make sacrifices so that everyone had an equal reward.
Reciprocity speaks about our human characteristics. This is where we expect people to meet our needs if we meet theirs, (if you have my back, I will have your back). We can look at each person’s situation and understand his/her motivation. In my case, I am most concern about my self-interest. I would consider living at home with a man and being the sole breadwinner for the family a huge cost, while my friend would think having him is enough reward. Individuals normally asset their profit against what they deserve and the exchange theory calls this the comparison level.
In this theory it deals with rewards and cost. Reward which is anything that one will enjoys and would choose in the absence of added cost. Cost on the other hand is anything that the individual doesn’t like and would deter an activity. I must say am in some agreement with this theorist and his theory whenever individual enters a relationship they enter as a result of what is in it for them .Therefore questions like what are the benefits of staying in this relationship ,am I happy in this relationship are the rewards more than the cost. For individual to stay in a relationship there has to be some levels of reward which will motivate the next party to stay, for example I have a friend who is a relationship with this man ,the man does nothing for her ,no money ,they do not go out together but yet the guy goes out with other females ,the only thing that she does get is the sex ,right there it is evident that her cost outweighs her rewards. Also we on the outside looking in, we don’t know the reason for her wanting to stay in that relationship so therefore we cannot say much. This theory emphasizes that we are rational being we calculate the ratio of rewards then choose the action that we think is least costly, if this person is thinking rationally and choose this! What would she choose if she was not thinking rationally?? The theory also states that we compare ourselves with others and expect that it is only fair we receive the same or similar treatment and infact we should for example I don’t like washing and cooking hence my partner does them while I do something else my friend visit my home and see him washing and cooking goes home and demand her husband to wash,cook or help with the chores and not just sit and do nothing. She will eventually analyze her situation and decide to leave because there’s no reward. It’s in our nature if we do something good we are expecting the same in return.
The exchange theory is of the view that people establish relationship that will benefit them rather than cost them. I agree with the theorist that in order for relationship to be satisfying the benefits should be greater than the cost. Some sources of reward include security, social approval, equality and interest. In my family this theory fits in, because the rewards are greater than the cost when calculated. In my family I am given the love, financial support, and education that is vital for my development. However, not all families receive greater rewards than punishment. In my colleague’s family she is abused verbally and physically but she stays in the relationship to provide security for her two children. In my opinion her punishment is greater than her reward. I life it is human nature to expect to be treated the same way we treat others. I do agree that reward and cost varies. It is depending on what we think is fair for us. According to the theorist when we evaluate our benefits against what we think we deserve, this is called comparison level. I must agree because we are humans and we make comparison from time to time. For example Mary and Sandra would discuss their relationship. During the discussion Mary would boast about how much money her husband gives her to shop for the family. Sandra would examine her relationship carefully then probably get upset with her spouse because, he is not giving her as much as what Mary receives for shopping. After studying this theory, I now realize the decisions I have made in my personal life were not by accident. They were based on the exchange theory.
yes Heather I agree with you because if you feel a sense of security you will remain in a relationship no matter what is happening as long as the reward is greater than the cost then it would surely benefit the person in the relationship.
Exchange Theory This theory speaks about persons being encouraged by self interest and thinks about one’s self in starting a relationship. It also helps us to identify love in relationship. The theory can be associated with many types of relationship in our today’s society, both males and females enter relationships because of what they will receive or gain financially from the relationship. For instant, I know this young man who only enters a relationship simply because of sexual pleasures and he gives nothing in return. He will only call is female partner merely when he want sex. He does not take her out on dates nor introduce her to his social circle. Evaluating this scenario, persons will wonder “is the relationship productive in any way”. Personally I think not, however, the female in the situation is comfortable I assume. The man does not have to think about the financial security and emotional needs of the female, desire or commitment and only his need are important to him. In having this type of relationship he is preventing himself from getting hurt by anyone and saving himself money in the process. The theory would conclude that the young rewards are greater than his cost. Reciprocity is a very important aspect in this theory as well. Individuals except to receive incentives when they give things to someone whether financially or otherwise. For example, when at work if I ask a particular child to do something for me the child expects me to give him something when he return from the errand given. I will have to give a sweet or something. Therefore the child expects something thus I am not predominantly eager to ask that child to do anything as I realize I have to give him something in order for him to do something for me.
The exchange theory is a funny one. It states that "we can look at a persons situation and tell their motivation" due to this I disagree with you in this case. Each individual is in the relationship for a reason and they stay in that relationship because they believe it is beneficial to them or they cant do better. But at the end, we are all rational beings, your friend might be in it for the sexual pleasure and this could also be the motive of the women he's with. couldn't these women could be rich, married women who don't want any emotional attachment?
This theory focuses on how individual’s personal resources such as income, education, and personality affect their formation and continuation in relationship. This also involves how a person’s emotional involvement which leans toward how relationship affects the relative power in the relationship. Hence these factors motivate individual by self interest and seeks relationship that benefit or reward them. These sources of reward include money, equality, security, and social approval. For instance, most relationships nowadays are based on the concept of the rewards each individual can achieve from each other. It is no longer what I can give towards the relationship; it is all about what I can receive. Therefore if he/ she cannot gain a profit or if they are not going to be treated as another individual is being treated in a particular union the relationship will not exist. As a result relationship should be characterized by interrelationship and concentrate on how to build the social and personal fulfillment within the relationship and not only to gain rewards. For e.g. If I am involved in a relationship with my boyfriend he shows his love to me by giving gifts from time to time then I should give him the same treatment. This social exchange is governed by the rules of reciprocity which suggest that it is expected that people should meet their needs, help them and not hurt those who help them.
The things that people value in life are different, what is important to one person might not be of any worth to the next. While looking at the exchange theorist I remember a comment made by a friend of mine. The man in most relationships is always the one to cheat but in this case the woman is the one who is cheating. The husband knows about it, they went for counselling and the behaviour continues. However, the husband decided that he is not going to divorce his wife because of his children and the love he has for his wife. Although his wife is unfaithful to him he remains faithful and when the wife is out with her friends he would be the one to take care of the children. I use to think that this man has a low self-esteem issue, by saying “I am the reason for my wife cheating on me, I cannot satisfy her”; these are the words he normally uses. Learning about the exchange theory I realize that the man does not want to leave his wife because they have accomplished a lot in life for example, they own their own business, bought their home, nice vehicles and have valuable things, therefore the reward is greater than the cost so he decide to stay in the relationship. The gentleman also wants to ensure that the children are safe. None of two wants to walk away from the luxurious life, of owning their business, home and vehicles so they live in the same house but share different living facilities. The exchange theory does not look only on married people by persons in relationships and are committed to each other; persons can also be in a common law relationship and stay in the relationship because the rewards are greater than the cost.
Exchange Theory
ReplyDeleteThe exchange theory reminds me about what is happening in our natural environment on a daily basis. Some individuals enter into relationships for rewards excluding love. For example I have had friends who have entered into relationships with married men and when you asked them why they are doing it, They will clearly state that the married man will give them money, gifts, love, take them out to many places and the list goes on. They will tell you they don’t have to wash, cook and clean for this man because that’s the duty of his wife.
Looking at the situation one may asked why this young lady is wasting her time on this man when there is no future in the relationship. This means most times the man will not divorce his wife for this mistress. Knowing this, the young lady will out rightly tell you that she does not want him to leave his wife because he is satisfying all her needs in the present situation. So right there she sees her rewards exceeding the cost of the relationship.
As the theory speaks to reciprocity, I have had experience of this with my immediate family member. I was always buying gifts for my cousin’s birthday because I think birthdays are important and persons should be treated special on such days. Over several years, I have noticed that not even a phone call I would get when it’s my birthday so I decided to stop what I was doing, because I was not motivated to continue. I would do other little kind things to her like putting credit on her phone and I have noticed that I was the one making all the calls. Whenever she calls she is asking me to grant her favours.
Having experienced this, the theory has re-enforced the concept I have about some individuals that they are opportunist. They are friends with you because of what you have to give them.
I do agree with you Suzette that some persons are opportunists. As it relates to the young lady being involved with married men, it is only the tangible rewards example money and going to fancy places, that forms the basis of her relationship and nothing else. If a particular married man is unable to offer her those rewards she is not going to stick around. Sometimes even us are opportunists, we maintain a level of friendship with persons based on the links or access they have to important persoons or things we need to achieve our goals.
DeleteThe exchange theory forms the basis of relationships that exist in the environment. It views humans as rational beings who are motivated by self- interest. Some persons engage in relationships only because of the benefits they can get. An example of one such person is my friend. She is controlling and demands maximum attention at all times. She is interested in men who own fancy rides, give her money, and pay her bills and men who are associated with the upper echelons of society. If she dates someone who falls short of any of these expectations she discontinues all forms of communication with the person. She has never yet mentioned anything about love and affection; it’s all about the tangible benefits.
ReplyDeleteAs people calculate their benefits versus the cost of their relationships they also make comparisons. We often compare ourselves with other persons which lead us into making decisions. An example of this is my sister’s previous relationship. She ended the relationship with her boyfriend because her benefits were less than what her best friend was getting. She wanted to be on the same level with her best friend. She too wanted money, house, a car and opportunities to travel to different countries among other things. One may say it is not all that you should want from a relationship, but that was all she wanted the other rewards did not matter much to her.
The theory also looks at reciprocity, where we meet each other’s need I can relate to that in my previous relationship. My children’s father only spoke about what I will have to do for him, when we are living together and not what he was going to do for me. This contributed to me ending our relationship, as he was very selfish and inconsiderate.
In concluding the theory emphasizes that relationships are determined by the rewards or benefits a person can get.
Many may have stared at an older man with a younger woman. For those who have stared, since you are curious, the Exchange Theory is the answer to your provoked thought which is, his or her reward is greater than the cost.
ReplyDeleteThe Exchange theory examines people as being self motivated by reward versus cost. The focused of this theory is that people maximizes their rewards and minimizes their cost. Consequently, people remain in their situations because their reward is greater than the cost. This theory speaks of rewards and cost as resources ( tangible and intangible) such as money, control good looks, youth , power, fame or attraction to name a few. A relationship will therefore be established if the rewards are greater or equal to the cost.
In Social Exchange Theorist, it is assumed that it is the balance and imbalance of cost and rewards that leads to marriage or divorce. Though this assumption may be the case for some many does not spend the time to weight their rewards against their cost. Many are forced into marriages because of traditional rites while some in marriages because of affected self-esteem, self-concept and self worth. For example my neighbour continues to live with her husband with years of abuse. When she is questioned about the continuation of the marriage, she will ask, 'who will love and cherish a woman who is not beautiful with ten (10) children. Clearly my neighbour has a self-esteem problem because she does not think she can get love and affection from a decent man.
The Exchange Theory
ReplyDeleteThe Exchange Theory is one of the most realistic theories about the family. Everyone is motivated by the answer to the question, “what is in it for me?” A smart individual seeks a relationship that benefits or reward them rather than a relationship that punish or cost them. However, rewards or costs are selective to each individual and their situation. What one person would consider a reward another may consider it a cost depending on what they believe is fair to them.
Before knowing about the exchange theory there was a point in my life where I had to measure the cost and rewards in my family. I had the decision of moving to live with my baby’s father or staying in my permanent job. This decision would cost me my job, independence and my freedom (not having to wash, cook and clean for one extra person). The benefit of this would include having the love of my life with me every minute of the day. In my opinion the cost over weighs the benefit. Even though we stayed in the relationship we had to adjust and make sacrifices so that everyone had an equal reward.
Reciprocity speaks about our human characteristics. This is where we expect people to meet our needs if we meet theirs, (if you have my back, I will have your back). We can look at each person’s situation and understand his/her motivation. In my case, I am most concern about my self-interest. I would consider living at home with a man and being the sole breadwinner for the family a huge cost, while my friend would think having him is enough reward. Individuals normally asset their profit against what they deserve and the exchange theory calls this the comparison level.
In this theory it deals with rewards and cost. Reward which is anything that one will enjoys and would choose in the absence of added cost. Cost on the other hand is anything that the individual doesn’t like and would deter an activity. I must say am in some agreement with this theorist and his theory whenever individual enters a relationship they enter as a result of what is in it for them .Therefore questions like what are the benefits of staying in this relationship ,am I happy in this relationship are the rewards more than the cost. For individual to stay in a relationship there has to be some levels of reward which will motivate the next party to stay, for example I have a friend who is a relationship with this man ,the man does nothing for her ,no money ,they do not go out together but yet the guy goes out with other females ,the only thing that she does get is the sex ,right there it is evident that her cost outweighs her rewards. Also we on the outside looking in, we don’t know the reason for her wanting to stay in that relationship so therefore we cannot say much. This theory emphasizes that we are rational being we calculate the ratio of rewards then choose the action that we think is least costly, if this person is thinking rationally and choose this! What would she choose if she was not thinking rationally??
ReplyDeleteThe theory also states that we compare ourselves with others and expect that it is only fair we receive the same or similar treatment and infact we should for example I don’t like washing and cooking hence my partner does them while I do something else my friend visit my home and see him washing and cooking goes home and demand her husband to wash,cook or help with the chores and not just sit and do nothing. She will eventually analyze her situation and decide to leave because there’s no reward. It’s in our nature if we do something good we are expecting the same in return.
FAMILY EXCHANGE THEORY
ReplyDeleteThe exchange theory is of the view that people establish relationship that will benefit them rather than cost them. I agree with the theorist that in order for relationship to be satisfying the benefits should be greater than the cost. Some sources of reward include security, social approval, equality and interest.
In my family this theory fits in, because the rewards are greater than the cost when calculated. In my family I am given the love, financial support, and education that is vital for my development. However, not all families receive greater rewards than punishment. In my colleague’s family she is abused verbally and physically but she stays in the relationship to provide security for her two children. In my opinion her punishment is greater than her reward.
I life it is human nature to expect to be treated the same way we treat others. I do agree that reward and cost varies. It is depending on what we think is fair for us. According to the theorist when we evaluate our benefits against what we think we deserve, this is called comparison level. I must agree because we are humans and we make comparison from time to time. For example Mary and Sandra would discuss their relationship. During the discussion Mary would boast about how much money her husband gives her to shop for the family. Sandra would examine her relationship carefully then probably get upset with her spouse because, he is not giving her as much as what Mary receives for shopping. After studying this theory, I now realize the decisions I have made in my personal life were not by accident. They were based on the exchange theory.
yes Heather I agree with you because if you feel a sense of security you will remain in a relationship no matter what is happening as long as the reward is greater than the cost then it would surely benefit the person in the relationship.
DeleteExchange Theory
ReplyDeleteThis theory speaks about persons being encouraged by self interest and thinks about one’s self in starting a relationship. It also helps us to identify love in relationship. The theory can be associated with many types of relationship in our today’s society, both males and females enter relationships because of what they will receive or gain financially from the relationship. For instant, I know this young man who only enters a relationship simply because of sexual pleasures and he gives nothing in return. He will only call is female partner merely when he want sex. He does not take her out on dates nor introduce her to his social circle.
Evaluating this scenario, persons will wonder “is the relationship productive in any way”. Personally I think not, however, the female in the situation is comfortable I assume. The man does not have to think about the financial security and emotional needs of the female, desire or commitment and only his need are important to him. In having this type of relationship he is preventing himself from getting hurt by anyone and saving himself money in the process. The theory would conclude that the young rewards are greater than his cost.
Reciprocity is a very important aspect in this theory as well. Individuals except to receive incentives when they give things to someone whether financially or otherwise. For example, when at work if I ask a particular child to do something for me the child expects me to give him something when he return from the errand given. I will have to give a sweet or something. Therefore the child expects something thus I am not predominantly eager to ask that child to do anything as I realize I have to give him something in order for him to do something for me.
The exchange theory is a funny one. It states that "we can look at a persons situation and tell their motivation" due to this I disagree with you in this case. Each individual is in the relationship for a reason and they stay in that relationship because they believe it is beneficial to them or they cant do better. But at the end, we are all rational beings, your friend might be in it for the sexual pleasure and this could also be the motive of the women he's with. couldn't these women could be rich, married women who don't want any emotional attachment?
DeleteExchange Theory
ReplyDeleteThis theory focuses on how individual’s personal resources such as income, education, and personality affect their formation and continuation in relationship. This also involves how a person’s emotional involvement which leans toward how relationship affects the relative power in the relationship. Hence these factors motivate individual by self interest and seeks relationship that benefit or reward them. These sources of reward include money, equality, security, and social approval. For instance, most relationships nowadays are based on the concept of the rewards each individual can achieve from each other. It is no longer what I can give towards the relationship; it is all about what I can receive.
Therefore if he/ she cannot gain a profit or if they are not going to be treated as another individual is being treated in a particular union the relationship will not exist. As a result relationship should be characterized by interrelationship and concentrate on how to build the social and personal fulfillment within the relationship and not only to gain rewards.
For e.g. If I am involved in a relationship with my boyfriend he shows his love to me by giving gifts from time to time then I should give him the same treatment. This social exchange is governed by the rules of reciprocity which suggest that it is expected that people should meet their needs, help them and not hurt those who help them.
The things that people value in life are different, what is important to one person might not be of any worth to the next. While looking at the exchange theorist I remember a comment made by a friend of mine. The man in most relationships is always the one to cheat but in this case the woman is the one who is cheating. The husband knows about it, they went for counselling and the behaviour continues.
ReplyDeleteHowever, the husband decided that he is not going to divorce his wife because of his children and the love he has for his wife. Although his wife is unfaithful to him he remains faithful and when the wife is out with her friends he would be the one to take care of the children.
I use to think that this man has a low self-esteem issue, by saying “I am the reason for my wife cheating on me, I cannot satisfy her”; these are the words he normally uses. Learning about the exchange theory I realize that the man does not want to leave his wife because they have accomplished a lot in life for example, they own their own business, bought their home, nice vehicles and have valuable things, therefore the reward is greater than the cost so he decide to stay in the relationship. The gentleman also wants to ensure that the children are safe. None of two wants to walk away from the luxurious life, of owning their business, home and vehicles so they live in the same house but share different living facilities. The exchange theory does not look only on married people by persons in relationships and are committed to each other; persons can also be in a common law relationship and stay in the relationship because the rewards are greater than the cost.